The Reasons for Today

After sitting here pondering the events of the day, I wonder how I reached this point. Alone, yet married with a puppy named ginger wagging happily beneath my feet. Slowly, it happened. First, moved out of the apartment I shared with be best friend from high school and had spent the most fabulous three months of my life with. Then I slowly moved into my boyfriend’s condo, moving further away from my family and most importantly my mother whom I spent most my time chatting, cooking, baking and sharing with. The final move came after I married my fiancé. His career forced us to make the move across the mountains to farthest you can go still being a Washington resident but minutes from becoming an Oregonian.

The mountains perhaps are the problem or possibly the five hour commute or perhaps it’s the fact that I am not one of these people. I do not belong here so far from my family and friends yet still attempt to find my niche any niche something to call my own. I cry everyday. I call home, call my best friend and often write to God but nothing seems to help.

I work now. I work the days away, so I don’t have to sit by myself at home. I substitute where I hope to teach my days a way in my own classroom if ever one should vacate in a town with only one high school. I also work at a French restaurant, supposedly the best in town but only make half a day’s worth in a substituting.

I don’t really care for the cash the uppity wine connoisseurs tip me. I work for the contact; the human interaction. Escape from the torture of being alone.
Then he walked in. A slight Hispanic accent, shy yet, he knew exactly what he wanted; a good meal with the best wine in the house.